After a few months, he said he didn’t have anything, and I figured, we’re in our 40s – who lies about these things?
So, as the relationship got more serious, we stopped using condoms.
In this type of situation, the positive partner might try to make the negative partner feel guilty for being uninfected and may even threaten to expose the partner by insisting on having unsafe sex, for example.
I just didn’t want it to go any further at that point.
His reaction, he just kind of freaked out a little bit. He ended up getting sick a couple of weeks later and decided to get tested again.
I was 25 and I had been dating a guy for about five years. We found out he had full-blown AIDS so I got tested. Then I also tested positive.” Brenda Higgins was diagnosed in 2007.
“A sisterhood of women facing HIV together,” explains Nicole. “It’s never easy and it’s always very nerve wracking,” Brenda says.
In these situations, the HIV negative partner might intentionally make the positive partner feel (financially or otherwise) indebted to her or him for being in the relationship, may exploit the status of the partner to gain access to resources, or may be even disrupt the positive partner's medication regimen, endangering her or his health.